This is the rough edit of my thriller opening. This is not the final cut. There are some problems with this opening such as the timing of the dissolves isn't right and the music cuts in one scene of the opening. These problems would be solved by next week to meet the deadline.
Some revisions are required to add to suspense, they are as follows:
ReplyDeleteChange to white "a film by....." can't read black font.
Hold your titles longer and the text of the message, you take them off the screen to quickly. Also can;'t read the text message, play around with white or subtle colour.
I'd suggest you super impose through long dissolves images of the male watcher as Kirsty makes her way to her friend. This would increase suspense and give more of a twist to the cliff hanger.
Where Kirsty turns around when with her collapsed friend it may be wise to cut to black between these shots.
You cut too quickly at the point of the cliff hanger, I'd try slow motion here to emphasise the sinister/enigmatic nature of this shot.
Well done Tim for all the work you are doing on your film. 100% commitment here.
It may be more effective you you place the title of the film at the point where the man takes Kirsty's arm.